What the cuss!

I’m a perfectionist. I think that is part of the reason I haven’t written in a while. The more and more I thought about  perfectionism, the less and less I wanted to write. It’s a little self-defeating. The more and more I look back, the more and more I realize that I am somewhat of a perfectionist. I will say that I am not a perfectionist because I am trying to please others, I am a perfectionist because my name is behind it. As far back as I can remember, if something was not done the way I deemed fit, I would not turn it in. I would not present it, I would not do it. I feel that if my name is behind it, it has to follow my standards. Not perfect, just what I think is great. I realize that no one is perfect. Period. I think that my issue with perfectionism ties to my issue with quitting somehow. The question is why?

A good friend of mine asked why I haven’t blogged in a while, and this is the reason. I don’t want my blog to become a big complaint. Had I written the articles I was planning to write in the past month, they all would have consisted of complaints, and selfishness; not reflection and analysis of myself and discovery. This is no excuse however. In hindsight, posting those articles probably would have given more perspective to my readers of where I am coming from. I will post them eventually, however now is not that time.

I have said it before, and I will say it again. I am my own worst enemy. I believe I just found the root of my quitting issues. Perfectionism. I have to stop analyzing myself and the things I do so critically.

I believe I am making some great headway. I’m just glad that I found the root of the problem. Perfectionism.

Far From Idle

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One thought on “What the cuss!

  1. kuuuu-dos!

    Finding the root of apprehension is a wondrous thing. My personal apprehension root: fear that it’s all for nothing. I kept thinking that it was useless to blog if no one would read it. But–I was wrong. Writing, for me, is theraputic. So, I must write, even if no one reads. You must write, even if it’s about negative complaints of life. You’re right–we wanna know that stuff too. Keep up the writing, and I’ll keep up the reading. 🙂

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