The First Day.

Courtesy of Axel Klein.
Photo courtesy of Axel Klein.

There is no time like the present.

I haven’t discussed this yet, today seemed like a good day to discuss.

Something happened two months ago. I was laid off. Oh no!

Devastating right? Honestly, my feeling was the opposite. I felt a sense of relief, a weight lifted off my shoulders, and happiness for the first time in a long time.

I guess my situation is a little different. I don’t have children, which means I’m not responsible for another life, and my biggest “responsibilities” are my student loans, rent and other typical post-graduate duties. Luckily,  have the Student Loan CPA to aid me with this.

I likened the layoff to that of a baseball player nearing the end of their career, minus the end part. When some baseball players are nearing the end of a career or contract, they are sometimes paid (at least what is left on their contract) to go away. Perhaps that’s arrogant of me. I worked as a generalist and specialist (yes both. It’s a long story I’ll save for later) at a corporation. If you work for a corporation, you are expendable. Period. Don’t ever forget that. Read this article from Penelope Trunk. Specialists rule. Period. 

It’s all perspective right? Wrong.

When anything happens, you have two choices. You either react to the situation or you respond to it. (Look at the current steroid situation in baseball. A certain player, whom of which is guilty has reacted to every single thing that has happened during the investigation in which there is clear evidence against. Let’s just say he reacts a lot. Haven’t figured it out yet? A-Rod…)

Reacting is emotionally based decision based on what happened, and responding is including thought, rational as well as emotion into your response to something. In my opinion anyway.

I think I would be lying if I wasn’t a little thrown off by the suddenness of it, but honestly the timing was perfect. It was right before an eye-opening, beautiful experience that I fondly call Portugal. (HUGE thanks to the Rotaract Club of Kansas City, Rotary Club 13 Kansas City, Plaza Kansas City Rotary Club and Rotary International for making this trip possible.)

Maybe this is over-sharing, or arrogant or not but the TIMING was PERFECT. Why was the timing for getting laid off perfect you ask? 

1) Haven’t been on a vacation in 3 years. I hadn’t. Between working, working and working, I hadn’t done much else. I mean yes, I’ve visited family but not truly gotten away. Portugal was my first trip overseas and the first vacation I had by myself. This was significant because I had a lot of time to reflect on everything and not have to deal with comments about the event to anyone except for me and God.

2) It was my first trip overseas. I had opportunities at my University to travel abroad, but because of decisions related to one of my past pursuits, I lost that opportunity. I’ll spare the details. Just click on this link for more info.

3) I could finally lose myself. Going overseas provided the opportunity to get lost. I mean really get lost. I lost the old person, and came back renewed, refreshed, reinvigorated. (Alliteration alert. Haha.)

Perhaps this quote will help.

“Life is painful and messed up. It gets complicated at the worst of times, and sometimes you have no idea where to go or what to do. Lots of times people just let themselves get lost, dropping into a wide open, huge abyss. But that’s why we have to keep trying. We have to push through all that hurts us, work past all our memories that are haunting us. Sometimes the things that hurt us are the things that make us strongest. A life without experience, in my opinion, is no life at all. And that’s why I tell everyone that, even when it hurts, never stop yourself from living.” 
― Alysha Speer

But guess what? Pain is temporary. I think to some extent, throughout our entire lives we will get lost. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel that to some extent when all this began.

I think you need some faith. Without faith, I think its difficult to start. We always see these quotes about starting things, etc. however without faith you can’t make the first move. The first step begins with faith. No faith, no go.

A lot has happened since I returned from this awesome trip. I share some details of this as well. Kidding! I’ll share that in another post.

I’ll end with this.

When nothing is certain, everything is possible.

Onward my friends!

“Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.”
Bill Cosby

I guess I’m in a quoting mood today.

Far From Idle

Come. Find out why.

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